I am having a problem and I need your advice. I am 23 and my mind torments me at times. When I was eight years old, my mother took in a boy to live with us. She called him her foster child. She did not adopt him, his parents gave him up.
My mother used to bathe him outside naked because he was not accustomed to an inside bathroom. He even used to mess up the toilet. It took a long time for him to get accustomed to the inside bathroom.
When my mother was bathing him, he didn't have any shame and people used to see her bathing him. My mother taught him everything and he was a bright boy in school. My mother told me that when I went out if people asked who he was, I should say that he is my brother. My father did not favour him at first, but he got to like him because he was not lazy.
I am ashamed to tell you that he was the first boy I had sex with. My mother used to leave us alone, and my father was never home because of the type of work he did. And we used to fool around. The first time he saw me naked, I was the one who showed him my vagina.
And I asked him if he wanted some and he said yes. We were 15 years old. My mother became suspicious when she saw certain signs on his brief that he was having sex and he could not explain to her what was going on. She asked me if he had sex with me. I told her no.
She asked him if he had sex with anybody and he said no. That was the end of the conversation.
When I was 18 years old, I left home for college. I missed my brother so much. He was more than a brother to me. We were lovers. I started a relationship with a guy in college two years ago. But I don't love him as much as my adopted brother.
My adopted brother told me I should not marry him. He said both of us should get married. I told my mother that I loved my boyfriend but I loved my brother more and I would like us to get married. She said I was crazy, not over her dead body.
My brother told me that we should try and get away and live in Canada and get married.
What do you think? Don't call me a bad girl or tell me to leave him.